Little boys

Encourage your little boy to embrace his curiosity to learn. Help him explore rock pools (and ignore the smelly sea things that find a way home in his sandy pockets), allow the removal of cereal from their boxes for construction purposes (and marvel at the cereal box city that has taken over his bedroom when it all seems too much!).

Let him make a mess in the dirt, collect bugs, have snails as pets, grow things (weird things!!), try out experiments with the kitchen utensils and don’t get too mad when the fan is pulled apart (even when you thought it was working just fine).

… Because little boys grow up fast (too fast!!) and memories fill aching spaces.

… And some day this zest for learning might just lead him on a great big grand adventure!

~ Here’s to you son!

Can

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Growing up can't was a dirty word in our household.

I was always pulled up on it and made to change my statement.

My Dad would remonstrate ' There is no such thing as can't!'

I begged to differ!!

As a child this was frustrating. I checked the dictionary

and .... it was in there, a contraction of I CAN NOT!

However

As an adult (and parent myself), 

I am so very grateful that this way of seeing things 

was so firmly entrenched in my thinking.

Because, eventually the message sank in and established a way of living that has forged and fashioned who I am today.

It helped me to overcome great odds, to persevere when the going got tough. 

I learnt to live over, not under
above, not beneath

higher, not lower

grounded and not airy fairy!!

So

I am currently finding myself journeying 

down the same path with my children and turning their cant's into cans.

They are not very impressed!

(I understand their pain.)

But 

 with the benefit of hindsight, I will continue to lead them

(and if necessary push them)

to believe in their dreams and that anything truly is possible!

Just because I can!

The power of forgiveness

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Recently I had the  privilege of talking with my daughter about the  power of forgiveness. The teenage years are tumultuous and our teens feel things very deeply. They are still learning how to work things through and negotiate how to handle what life throws at them. It is never easy (as we all know).  

Teaching our teens to extend grace and mercy through painful situations, means they in turn receive grace and mercy that actually allows them to live life boundless and free. 

Holding onto hurt only keeps us tight in the grasp of pain. Learning to let go and extend forgiveness means we not only release those who have hurt us, but we release ourselves from the prison of pain that keeps us locked up tight. When we deny unforgiveness its power or hold over our lives it can not establish a stronghold over us!  So thankful to have been handed the key to unlocking resentment or bitterness that attempts to settle in.   (Matthew 6:14)

Honest, open, heartfelt forgiveness is incredibly powerful ~ It has the power to heal.

'Forgiveness is a funny thing. It warms the heart and cools the sting.' - William Arthur Ward

'Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.' - Suzanne Sommers

Heart and Soul Pursuits

More gratitude here

lessons in an Art assignment

I look over at my daughter completely immersed in her creation and watch her careful putting together of an Art assignment. This sculpture has taken over our weekend, it's due in just a few days. Time is of the essence!

Time pressured - with her it always is, yet some how she always pulls it off, always refining under pressure.

I watch her cut the wire and shape the nothingness into something.

She stretches the chicken wire - snips it here and there, stuffing it full with paper. A head, a body and a leg emerge and all the while I watch. I watch creativity in progress and observe frustration at wire unwilling to bend. I capture delight as it finally takes on shape.

A smile suddenly lights her face.

I pause in this girlish glee and soak up the laughter bubbling forth.

 Enjoying the raw sound of success and its triumphant whoops.

I think about how she envisioned this creation long before she even started. I think about how she saw the potential in this wire and paper ... and despite a few setbacks she forged ahead anyway.

I think about how she put aside the doubts of her peers and their skeptical viewpoints and reached deep inside her imagination anyway.

And I think about how this is the way of faith - the seeing of something not yet formed. The knowing that the unseen and far off 

can one day be tangible and present. This trusting and believing in something not yet seen ... and I realise that this is exactly

how motherhood is.

Motherhood and Faith, both beginning with a hope in the heart 

and emerging as a vision of possibilities ... two peas in a pod,

two sides of a coin.

Motherhood and Faith ... a determined, resolute and courageous spirit that looks doubt, fear and uncertainty in the face and fiercely holds on.

This is the kind of faith I want, the kind of mother I want to be.

Quietly confident despite the odds - holding on fiercely and never letting go of the hope, the dream and the promise of tomorrow.

'HaPpY mOtHeRs DaY'

Linking up  with Ann Voskamp and Jen Ferguson.

Learning to listen

With the start of the school year we have reinstated routine once again. It is amazing how quickly the family lapses into lax rules and attitudes when just a few rules shift sideways! So once again we are back to eating sensibly around the dinner table (and not the t.v)  ... yes, during the holidays we camped out in the lounge room and ate dinner with our meals perched carefully across our laps. Let me tell you trying to get back to the dinner table was a bit of a chore at the beginning of the week! 


But I hit the jackpot last night with the best dinner conversation I have had in weeks. We sat there for an hour chatting! Yes, you heard right ... chatting with my teenagers for more than a few minutes ... and I loved every minute of it as I heard what is going on in their world. I must admit I said a whole lot less than I usually do. I listened with open ears and an open heart. I am learning to listen more these days and say so much less. My days of parental hovering are indeed numbered. Letting go is never easy. Not that I am letting go in the full sense of the word because there is still so much to do (and say) ... but, there is a definite shift occurring as my kids embark on their own journeys and begin to find their own way in the world. So, I held my words of wisdom, insightful admonitions, clever advice and the other motherly thoughts to myself and did not give them voice last night. Instead I listened ... I listened to the emerging voices of hope, distant dreams and future longings. Hopes to go to university, to explore their faith, to find a profession, leave home (tears!!), get married (sigh) and have kids (aaahhh!!). But, in all honesty, I was proud to hear how grown up my children sounded (and maybe a little in awe of how amazing they really are, despite the ups and downs of everyday life and a few rule violations!!).

I am learning it is less about what I need to say or what I think they need to hear and sometimes, more about what I don't say!

Unexpected

On Fridays around these parts we stop, drop, and write.

For fun, for love of the sound of words, for play, for delight, for joy and celebration at the art of communication.

For only five short, bold, beautiful minutes. Unscripted and unedited. We just write without worrying if it’s just right or not.

Won’t you join us?

1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. Most importantly: leave a comment for the person who linked up before you – encouraging them in their writing!

This weeks word is - 'Unexpected'.

Life can be unexpected 

with all the twists and turns. 

Parenting is this way, really really unexpected. 

I wasn't quite prepared for the way my heart enlarged 

when I brought my baby home from hospital.

Or the way my heart ached when their heart ached. 

The awe of being a mother was previously unimaginable,

hard to comprehend

and NOW hard to imagine any other way. 

The teenage years are so very unexpected. 

BUT it's not like you think. 

Things happen, wheels spin, the world turns on its axis 

and everything changes, 

in ways that you never dreamed of. 

It's all a bit of a surprise ... 

the gaining of independence, the pulling away, 

the learning to drive, of getting a job, 

of securing their own future.

It's all kind of bitter sweet.  

Unexpected joy, unexpected loss!

I was just thinking ...

I was just thinking how majestic and otherworldly a thunderstorm really is. It's currently thunder storming here....lightening is streaking across the sky and thunder is echoing in the distance. This kind of weather always make you feel like you want to snuggle down and stay safe indoors. As a kid I use to think that God must be shaken 'Heaven and Earth' as he romped around upstairs. I am still in awe of these spectacular displays .... that such ferocity and intensity comes from the heavens in spectacular displays of beauty and fierceness. Nature has both a raw beauty and serene antiquity to it... it is an ancient glory and splendour that defies belief. Relentless, resounding and magnificent....kind of reminds me of what God is like - truly awe inspiring and ethereal. Love that we get to catch a glimpse of His glory every now and then.

image Source

“Life is the fire that burns and the sun that gives light. Life is the wind and the rain and the thunder in the sky. Life is matter and is earth, what is and what is not, and what beyond is in Eternity.” - Roman Philosopher.

I was just thinking that opportunity is kind of like a door that must be opened. I want my kids to see impossibilities as possibilities...that sometimes opportunity has to be fought for and won....that opportunity while a gift must be unwrapped to be fully appreciated. I took this photo two weeks ago and it speaks to me of opportunity, something I have been discussing with my kids of late. Opportunity comes to us all but we have to open the door and walk though it to fully embrace what lies behind it. What do you see? ... a closed door or one to be opened? When the door is shut do you feel like it would be amiss of you to go further or do you knock upon that door with boldness and audacity? I have been teaching my kids that sometimes life is about pushing through rather than sitting back. That life is waiting for us to enter in, open up and embrace all that we are meant to be.... yes sometimes that requires us to knock so the door can be opened for us..... and when it is...wow - opportunity, purpose and destiny awaits. So when you are faced with a shut door, I would encourage you to knock and find out what awaits you. Open it....push through and step up .....you just never know what opportunity is waiting for you!


Knock and the door shall be opened....seek and you shall find!

True beauty...the light within.

I am currently on a journey with my fifteen year old daughter to discover her true beauty. (It is an ongoing one!) In a media saturated world of unrealistic body images and body touch ups, developing a healthy self esteem and positive internal framework has been at the forefront of my mind. Trying to strike a balance between the fantasy of the fashion world and the reality of her actual world has been somewhat of a challenge. Body image has been a big issue for us as we navigate healthy body perspectives! The voice of a mother is somewhat drowned out by peer opinions, media images and the impending world views. Telling her that true beauty has more to do with the condition of the heart and soul rather than developing the persona's of a glamour gal, fashionista or bo - ho rock chick has been an ongoing process. Eyeliner, lip gloss and bronzer are a girls best friend right now.


The creativity of the blank canvas (aka the face) has been a fascinating discovery {yes...her words, not mine!} All this external exploration has been a whole 'nother' world, for me and her. Trying to hold her back has been like keeping a bull from a red flag. Impossible, I know!! I am not opposed to a little experimentation as long as the focus is more than just skin deep. We are still working towards this end and revealing the true beauty from within.


'You can take no credit for beauty at sixteen. But if you are beautiful at sixty, it will be your soul's own doing.' - Marie Stopes


I love this quote because it suggests that true beauty is something defined deep within the soul. It is not the fleeting beauty of youth but rather the unfathomable beauty of a tender heart, compassionate soul and a gracious spirit. It is the gentle unfolding of a magnificent and resplendent refinement that slowly unravels over time. Beauty is defined as - having qualities that give great pleasure or satisfaction, delighting the senses or mind. Synonyms associated with this word include one being - fascinating, magnificent, resplendent, statuesque and excellent. It is my belief that these qualities refer to the inside of who you are. That great big smiling soul.


'People are like stained glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out. But when the darkness sets in there true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.' - Elizabeth Kuber - Ross

'My daughter -
You are beautiful

not because your tall or thin or lithe

nor because your hair is flat or smooth 

or if a smile is wide and even.

You are beautiful

because your heart is true

your soul is open

and the core of who you are is 

sweet and kind and good.'


'Your beauty was perfected because of My splendor which I bestowed on you.' Ezekiel 16:14 

'True beauty is a light that shines from within that touches the world with a warmth that illuminates the heart and ignites the soul in a tangible and welcome embrace.' - Kay Weight


© copyright k.weight 2011

Heart and Soul Pursuits - Click here.

Seriously!!

Amongst the business of life I sometimes get too serious (according to my children! - which is after they have been told to settle down from there much to boisterous frolicking!) Hhmmm ... its true. I think some of it has to do with the fact that I am parenting on my own. I am on duty 24/7 ... no let up ... always on the go, but seriously I love the 'awesomeness' of parenting. I am trying to loosen up though ... 

Laugh more often, muck around a bit more and find the joy in the every day. 

I should take lessons from my daughter, she really knows how to ham it up. A true comedian at heart, which is probably why we have to reign in the frivolity so often.  

I mean there is only so much squealing, giggling, tickling and play fighting that can go on in one day! She sure can sing at the top of her lungs, laugh uproariously and she really does make me laugh. She is a gentle reminder to not take life too seriously. So I am rather glad I have this lively, twirling, bouncing girl. (I think God knew what he was doing!) 

She has been dishing out a bit of parenting advice (You know, just in case I need it). 

Things like 'RELAX Mum', and 'Hey Mum, if you didn't keep telling us to do our jobs we would just get them done' Ha, really! ... so I tried it. It didn't work! 

Ahhh, the delight of the teenage years. I am thinking however that this 'unseriousness business' is a lesson I really could learn.

"You will live in joy and peace. The mountains and hills will burst into song, and the trees of the field will clap their hands!" Isaiah 55:12

          

 A few pics that the kids took

and they just might die if they knew I put these up

(you know, hugging and all!)

so sshhhh ... its just between us mkay ;)

linking up with  'Word Woman Wednesday' at House of Belonging
and 'picture me imperfectly' at Capturing Motherhood.

Colour Conference 2011

I can't wait for this years Colour Conference. Only 2 weeks away now. I have the privilege of taking my fifteen year old daughter with me and am looking forward to connecting with her away from the busyness of life. I am glad for the chance to get away for just one weekend where the things that usually demand my attention (like the washing, cleaning and gardening) can go unattended.  Time for just her, me and Sisterhood. I am excited about the opportunity to place value upon her womanhood as I continue to outwork what parenting a teenager looks like. Such a big job!! I'm learning to listen more and talk less. It never ceases to amaze me how quickly they grow. (so cliche I know) Just yesterday she wrapped her arms around me and gave me a hug. I was feeling the wait of the world and it was pressing in and squeezing hard. She is now much taller than I and it was her arms that enveloped me. I was overwhelmed. I who am meant to comfort was being comforted. Wow!....the power of an embrace. So determined to embrace more....... More Love * More Heart * More Sisterhood.

One Love * One Heart * One Sisterhood

"The Colour Sisterhood represents a company of down to earth, everyday women who desire to make a difference and make the world a better place - in essence it is a foundation seeking to place value upon humanity; a story of unity and alliance." - Colour Sisterhood.

 (Sisterhood Declaration)

I was so stirred at last years conference to the rise up moment for my life......the words 'be the change' went from a gentle whisper to a resounding shout. I could not ignore the restlessness within any longer....I knew this was my moment to do something. 

                                                            The story thus far

Never before had I been so sure of my next step.....I just knew that the orphans of Uganda was an initiative I wanted to align with. It was exactly where I needed to go to play my part. I love the thought that we have an irreplaceable role to play in the pages of a divine history.  I had been waiting for this opportunity for a life time. Watoto was everything I dreamed it would be and more. Each of us has a  part to play in bringing solution to the earth. We can all so something! 

                                               Current Initiatives

I am now expectant for the next moment for my life. I don't want to stop....this momentum, this heart change, this adventure. I want so much more but am wondering what that looks like?.....what lies ahead of me?.... I find the not knowing hard. Where to now? .....I'm not content to go back to my suburban life!.... I'm still trying to work out how a single mother can continue to change her world.

My Single Parent Life - Lessons from a single mother.

Lessons learnt in the art of living a full, purposeful and wonderful life.

 1. When you find yourself at the bottom, there is comfort in knowing that the only way left open is up. When there is nowhere else to go, you might as well start climbing.

2.  Miracles occur when we are desperate enough to believe. Wonderful things happen when nothing is all that you have. 

3.  The reality of life must not contain you - It is not the barometer that defines you. Life is but a stepping-stone over the bridge of destiny. 

4. Self-pity is underrated and regret a waste of time. Release yourself from the rewind and pause - Just press forward! 

5. Hope is around the corner and freedom is on the horizon - Get up and walk to it! 

6. Never measure yourself by earthly standards…. I do not see what I have lost - I see what I have left. 

7. Do not compare yourself to others - something unique will be lost. 

8. Seeds of purpose and destiny were deposited long ago.  They can never be stripped away. 

9.  Hope feels better than joy … it is an anchor for the soul.  
10.  Strength, faith and courage come from eyeballing doubt and looking fear straight in the face. Allow your soul to live wildly resplendent and free. 

      11. The most important things in life are really not things at all.  So live in the light of eternity. 

      12. When one is advancing - retreat is far away. 

      13.  Life is not about having things – it is about doing things. 

      14. Passion must be stirred up, it is not an ever present longing or desire. It is something we must choose to do and something we should wish to embrace. 

      15. Before the commencement of every dream is a period of restlessness. Permit your spirit to sing aloud to the rhythms of heaven. 

      16. When in doubt … just dance!


© copyright k.weight 2010